'I trained myself to feel strong’: Breast cancer survivor shares story of courage and hope

Inderdeep Sandhu

Cancer survivor Inderdeep Sandhu. Source: Supplied

Melbourne-based Inderdeep Sandhu’s life changed within three days when she found out in 2018 that she had triple-negative breast cancer. She not only survived cancer but also found a new meaning to her life which she claims is full of hope and joy.


Highlights
  • Triple-negative breast cancer has a lower survival rate than other types of breast cancer
  • Its remission time is five years, i.e., cancer can recur within that period after treatment
  • Ms Sandhu wants to share her experiences that have given a new meaning to her life
Ms Sandhu was diagnosed with a hard lump in 2018. Within three days, life changed for her and family as triple-negative breast cancer – an aggressive type of breast cancer – was detected.

“My doctors had explained to me that I’ll lose my hair. But before that could happen, I took control of the situation. I shaved off my head to stay ahead of cancer and the aftermath of chemotherapy,” says the breast cancer fighter.

'One can’t stop living'

The world came tumbling down for her young family.

“I’d cry in the shower when my hair fell off in clumps after chemotherapy,” she remembers without any resonance of pain in her voice.

Her husband was “very scared”, she recalls especially because they were deeply concerned about their three young children.
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Ms Sandhu and family in happier times. Source: Supplied
Her son wrote her an email the day she returned from the hospital. That day, she realised that contrary to people’s understanding, “children understand a lot more”.

“My daughter, Gurbani, who was five-years-old then, was most affected to see my hair gone missing after she got back from school one day. I then explained to her for mama to get well, this has to be done. This is when I explained to myself too that I can’t fall weak,” recalls Ms Sandhu, who in turn, draws strength from her father.

Her father, who she is the closest to, showed up in Melbourne within three months of the diagnosis.

“He always tells me that if you feel weak, the brain signals the body to become weak, so I trained myself to feel strong,” she says.
Inderdeep Sandhu
Inderdeep Sandhu took cancer by the horns and shaved her head before she lost her hair to chemotherapy. Source: Supplied
The footprint of a challenge like cancer extends beyond the mind and body to one’s finances too. It didn’t spare Ms Sandhu either.

“Despite support from the public health system and private health insurance, we were out of pocket for some expenses. On top of that, I had to resign from my job in 2019 because due to the removal of lymph nodes, I was unable to continue with my job."
Inderdeep Sandhu
Mr and Ms Sandhu. Source: Supplied
'Support from family in such situations is invaluable'

“My husband reduced his workload to be by my side and attend to my needs. Luckily, my mother-in-law was visiting us from India when we got to know about cancer. 

My father joined soon and so did my sister-in-law so that she could look after our children,” says Ms Sandhu, cautioning that while people around you try to give you strength, they sometimes also make you feel vulnerable.
I always told myself that there is nothing wrong with my body, I am bald and beautiful.
“I had to do a lot to stay away from negative thoughts. I had lost ‘middle ground’: either I was very happy or very sad. I had to reclaim that lost middle ground because life is too beautiful to let go,” she says, adding that The Secret by Rhonda Byrne was the guiding light about “sending out good vibes to the universe and receiving them back”.
Inderdeep Sandhu
Ms Sandhu with her son. Source: Supplied
Her word of advice for cancer patients and people in general

“Stay away from thoughts that remind you of your cancer, because your chances of dying from it are as good as that of a driver dying in a road accident.

"Stay positive and let love conquer your life. Life is beautiful but you need to take control of it to make that happen," she says.

International Women’s Day message

“On this special day, I would like to encourage you all to focus on “self-care”

“Self-care” is not being selfish. It is about looking after our physical and mental health to be able to look after or support others who depend on us,” said Ms Sandhu. 

“We all have an inner strength right inside us. All we need is to trust it. We should not wait for a crisis to start building our inner strength. Take control of it now. It’s never too late to write your own destiny!"
Inderdeep Sandhu
Source: Supplied
Ms Sandhu considers herself cured of cancer and is currently not taking any medicine.

She is advised to go through routine health check-ups every three months by her oncologist. 

Click on the player inside the picture at the top to listen to this interview in Punjabi.

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